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Crap joke thread....

Discussion in 'Off Topic' started by Schmoburger, Oct 16, 2006.

  1. David H

    David H Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    5,727
    Location:
    newcastle
    My youngest said 8 years ago . "Dad .. the horse is dead" This being a reference to 'flogging a dead horse' which is about the lesson has been learnt:p. The horse is dead Grantus if you'll let it die;).
    I'm doing some 'hard yards ' here:(. Any chance of some slack? for an error or two;).
    Cheers
     
  2. cbus

    cbus Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    12,373
    Location:
    sunshine coast
    Then leave it rather than play the victim.
    Move on .
    Fresh start ;)
     
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  3. David H

    David H Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    5,727
    Location:
    newcastle
    Can't see much 'victim' in my comment but happy to leave it behind;).
    Cheers
     
  4. tintop

    tintop Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    629
    Location:
    Canberra
    well there's a segue to a joke about riding a dead horse...you could change horses but in the public service other strategies are used, including the following:

    1. Buy a stronger whip

    2. Change riders.

    3. Say things like, “This is the way we always have ridden this horse.”

    4. Appoint a committee to study the horse.

    5. Visit other sites to see how they ride dead horses.

    6. Change the procedure to ride dead horses.

    7. Appoint a special team to revive the dead horse.

    8. Consider whether or not the rider needs more skill/knowledge to ride the dead horse.

    9. Compare the state of dead horses in today’s environment.

    10. Change the threshold of “dead” declaring that “This horse is not dead.”

    11. Hire contractors to ride the dead horse.

    12. Harness several dead horses together for increased speed.

    13. Provide additional funding to increase the horse’s performance.

    14. Perform a study to see if contractors can ride it cheaper.

    15. Purchase a product to make dead horses run faster.

    16. Declare the horse is “better, faster and cheaper” dead.

    17. Form a quality circle to find uses for dead horses.

    18. Revisit the performance requirements for horses.

    19. Develop an incentive awards program to encourage the dead horse to perform at acceptable levels.

    And if all else fails:

    20. Promote the dead horse to a supervisory position.
     
  5. cbus

    cbus Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    12,373
    Location:
    sunshine coast
    21. Pass law making discrimination / identification of dead horses illegal.

    22. Apply compulsory quota for dead horses.
     
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  6. Wayne murray

    Wayne murray Well-Known Member

    Messages:
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    Location:
    Seven hills
  7. Maxa1967

    Maxa1967 Member

    Messages:
    48
    Location:
    Western Queensland
    upload_2019-11-30_12-50-1.jpeg
     
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  8. BrianK

    BrianK Well-Known Member

    Messages:
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    Location:
    Mount Gambier, SA
  9. MAP77

    MAP77 Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    555
    Location:
    Campbelltown NSW
    79156023_2591699687581333_5238863763196608512_n.jpg
     
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  10. Wayne murray

    Wayne murray Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    3,429
    Location:
    Seven hills
  11. MAP77

    MAP77 Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    555
    Location:
    Campbelltown NSW
  12. MAP77

    MAP77 Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    555
    Location:
    Campbelltown NSW
  13. BrianK

    BrianK Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    7,575
    Location:
    Mount Gambier, SA
    I broke my finger last week.

    On the other hand, I'm okay.
     
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  14. AC-T3

    AC-T3 Well-Known Member

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  15. oldman

    oldman Super Moderator Staff Member

    Messages:
    9,002
    Location:
    Avalon Beach NSW
    Great track, great show.......wrong thread!
    Cheers,
    Mark
     
  16. AC-T3

    AC-T3 Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    1,013
    Location:
    Woy Woy
    Aw come on oldman, lighten up and consider the literal and lateral translation/interpretation of the original post. Sons of Monarchy vs Sons of Anarchy? Besides, many of the words fit. Will admit, none of this is a crap joke.
     
  17. oldman

    oldman Super Moderator Staff Member

    Messages:
    9,002
    Location:
    Avalon Beach NSW
    Honestly thought you meant to post in the What Are You Listening To Now ? thread !
    All good, great track even with the words changed....love the raw guitar....
    (and I was addicted to series......:rolleyes:)
    Honestly didn’t make the connection to the Dunce Andrew post......until now :p
    Cheers,
    Mark
     
  18. BrianK

    BrianK Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    7,575
    Location:
    Mount Gambier, SA
  19. tintop

    tintop Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    629
    Location:
    Canberra
    a couple of knocks on the door this morning - two mates asked me to cross the road and walk into the bar with them and change a light bulb - my life is a joke
     
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  20. MAP77

    MAP77 Well-Known Member

    Messages:
    555
    Location:
    Campbelltown NSW
    78146975_2660815944154734_5517479185041326080_n.jpg
     
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